Parent, UK
My stories
My School Story
My daughter was exited and happy to start school at first. She came home happy to show me what she had been doing and talking about her friends. I did not really get any indication that anything was wrong until I got a speech and language referral handed to me at the school gate (in front of the other parents). I was asked to clarify that she did actually speak English (she is bilingual). I thought it was odd that they did not know that she could speak English but went ahead with the referral. I had her first parent teacher consultation at the end of the first half term. I was expecting to see some nice art work and to be told nice things about how she was settling in it was very early days. It became immediately clear that the meeting was going to be a list of what the teacher felt were my daughter's shortcomings. Her teacher told me that my daughter 'may never function', that she 'would flap and make silly noises when she was expected to be quiet', that she never wanted to come out of the home corner when she was supposed to and that she was already behind with her studies. I was told that my daughter did not have any friends and that the other children did not like her.
I was very shocked. The feedback did not reflect how my daughter was at home at all. She is curious, very imaginative, creative, clever and extremely kind. My daughter was in a small class and her teacher did not seem to know her at all. I asked for another meeting, if the teachers report was a genuine representation of how my daughter was in school then something was not working and she needed some support. I was also very concerned that the teacher had nothing but bad things to say to me about my little girl. It was sad.
I had a few meetings with her teacher afterwards to try to get to the bottom of what was happening. I asked if they had tried anything to help. I was brushed off with "of course we always try things". I asked if the teacher could say anything nice about my daughter (and she could not). I was called in after that because my daughter was crying and inconsolable. Despite what the teacher said about nobody liking my daughter she had another little girl trying to comfort her. My daughter was so overwhelmed that she could not speak.
With all of this going on, my daughter was not really getting an education in school.
I was very shocked. The feedback did not reflect how my daughter was at home at all. She is curious, very imaginative, creative, clever and extremely kind. My daughter was in a small class and her teacher did not seem to know her at all. I asked for another meeting, if the teachers report was a genuine representation of how my daughter was in school then something was not working and she needed some support. I was also very concerned that the teacher had nothing but bad things to say to me about my little girl. It was sad.
I had a few meetings with her teacher afterwards to try to get to the bottom of what was happening. I asked if they had tried anything to help. I was brushed off with "of course we always try things". I asked if the teacher could say anything nice about my daughter (and she could not). I was called in after that because my daughter was crying and inconsolable. Despite what the teacher said about nobody liking my daughter she had another little girl trying to comfort her. My daughter was so overwhelmed that she could not speak.
With all of this going on, my daughter was not really getting an education in school.
What happened next...
I decided to remove my daughter from school because I did not want her to be educated by someone who was openly negative about her. I am aware that she may have been difficult for the teacher but she has many wonderful qualities and her teacher completely dismissed these.
Home education is perfect for my daughter. She does struggle with tasks that she perceives to be tricky and this means that she fidgets around or daydreams. I am able to work with her in small chunks with plenty of time for stories, imaginative play and outdoor play. She takes time to process information and will often show a really comprehensive understanding of what she has learned some time later. If I was to expect this instantly I would assume she had not learned anything.
My daughter is creative and loves art and poetry. She likes natural science and is interested in the world. She loves outdoor learning. Home education has given her far more opportunities than she had in school and she can see that she has her own strengths. At school the curriculum is very narrow and it means that if you are not good at sitting still, reading, phonics, handwriting and maths then you are seen as a failure. That said,my daughter is doing well in those areas with me there to support her 121 at her pace but she was falling behind in school.
My daughter has now been diagnosed with combined type adhd.
Home education is perfect for my daughter. She does struggle with tasks that she perceives to be tricky and this means that she fidgets around or daydreams. I am able to work with her in small chunks with plenty of time for stories, imaginative play and outdoor play. She takes time to process information and will often show a really comprehensive understanding of what she has learned some time later. If I was to expect this instantly I would assume she had not learned anything.
My daughter is creative and loves art and poetry. She likes natural science and is interested in the world. She loves outdoor learning. Home education has given her far more opportunities than she had in school and she can see that she has her own strengths. At school the curriculum is very narrow and it means that if you are not good at sitting still, reading, phonics, handwriting and maths then you are seen as a failure. That said,my daughter is doing well in those areas with me there to support her 121 at her pace but she was falling behind in school.
My daughter has now been diagnosed with combined type adhd.
How I think schools could be better.
School caters for the majority and is a one size fits all approach to education. Some children will inevitably struggle to fit that mould. I think if the school had the time to get to know my daughter and support her to succeed it would have been better. Schools and teachers are driven by achieving a narrow set of results and so anyone who does not fit into that box is seen as a problem.