Nicki, Cardiff
My stories
My School Story
I never felt like I fitted in at school. Academically I was well ahead, I achieved great exam results and the teachers all loved me, but emotionally I was miserable, overwhelmed, anxious, had low self esteem and a perfectionist trait which meant I put myself under a lot of pressure to do well.
In year 7 my maths teacher told me that “intelligent people are never bored” after I complained that I was bored in class as the work was too easy. I concluded that I must therefore be stupid. Years later I can still hear his voice.
In primary school I got by but had turned to self harm by the age of 8 as a way of coping.
Secondary school was far worse for me and I felt lost and overwhelmed in a huge school. The school motto was “Good enough never is” and this reminded me daily that I was not good enough and never would be. If it wasn’t for the music department I don’t think I would have survived. I spent all my breaks and lunchtimes there and felt safe.
I remember telling my RE teacher that I was utterly miserable and her response was, “don’t be silly, you’re a straight A student”. I didn’t try and ask for help again for several years when I told a teacher that I was cutting myself. He laughed awkwardly and changed the subject. I never tried to ask for help again.
Despite excellent GCSE results, there was no way I could continue in school and so I never went on to do A levels or go to uni. I did not fit into the school system and have such trauma that any kind of course or training triggers me to self destructive thoughts even now.
In year 7 my maths teacher told me that “intelligent people are never bored” after I complained that I was bored in class as the work was too easy. I concluded that I must therefore be stupid. Years later I can still hear his voice.
In primary school I got by but had turned to self harm by the age of 8 as a way of coping.
Secondary school was far worse for me and I felt lost and overwhelmed in a huge school. The school motto was “Good enough never is” and this reminded me daily that I was not good enough and never would be. If it wasn’t for the music department I don’t think I would have survived. I spent all my breaks and lunchtimes there and felt safe.
I remember telling my RE teacher that I was utterly miserable and her response was, “don’t be silly, you’re a straight A student”. I didn’t try and ask for help again for several years when I told a teacher that I was cutting myself. He laughed awkwardly and changed the subject. I never tried to ask for help again.
Despite excellent GCSE results, there was no way I could continue in school and so I never went on to do A levels or go to uni. I did not fit into the school system and have such trauma that any kind of course or training triggers me to self destructive thoughts even now.
How I think schools could be better.
Reduce the pressure on children, reduce the number of tests and exams. Give children more autonomy and stop trying to make all children fit into the same mould. A lot more time needs to be given to improving mental health for young people. Teaching about mindfulness, understanding emotions, assertiveness, transactional analysis, how to cope with stress and similar will be far more useful for the rest of our children’s lives than quadratic equations. Increase the opportunities for subjects like music, art, drama, DT and sport.
Far more support for SEN children. Smaller classes, reduced timetables, chill out spaces. Counsellors and pastoral support for all schools. Time in nature and more play time.
Far more support for SEN children. Smaller classes, reduced timetables, chill out spaces. Counsellors and pastoral support for all schools. Time in nature and more play time.